Really needing and appreciating this talk today:
As Allyson says in the talk, sometimes, as an artist, you have to ride two horses.
You can't always dive right into your dream job and expect it to work right away. Especially in the world that we live in right now, the value of fine arts and hand crafted items is severely lacking in comparison to the peaking interest in virtual design and animation.
I'm beginning to realize that in order to make my artistic practice work for me, and also survive financially, I may have to go back to working full time at my desk job. This shouldn't be such a big deal, or anything to complain about, except that it feels like a dying of the soul in some way. I feel like I have failed the divine in that I haven't accomplished as much as I needed in order to continue in the path that I love.
You have to create / envision a project bigger than yourself, and strive for that.
My project was relatively more manageable: "To create and sustain a successful, loving practice." This is mainly in response to my own life and surroundings. I wanted to create a loving and supportive environment in my home, and it worked! However... the finances are now dwindling and I fear that my partner is losing faith in my artistic endeavors. It's a very disheartening feeling -- the soul crushing moment.
Yet, it seems that I was in need of a wake up call. Work harder, it says... Believe in yourself, it says... You are the divine in you and let it flow through you. The only thing holding you back is yourself and your doubt.
I pray to find what it is I seek: a cause worth fighting for and a means to articulate it. I pray to know my purpose here.